HeartThoughts Meadow

We're coming up on the year anniversary of Zabby Dog's death.
My feelings about that ebb and flow in that she was so ill, her passing was a blessed relief.
But also- I miss her.
That declaration continues to surprise me these many months on.
Surely I've written about our relationship in all its nuances prior, so I won't rehash it here.
But know that as I've always identified as a bonafide 'Cat Person', the feelings I grew for her were both complex and genuine.
And- I miss her.

She's buried underneath a multi-varietal grafted apple tree next to the fence on the NW corner of the property.
The path to the chicken coop runs between it and the plum tree, so I pass her at least twice a day, if not more.
And I can always see her out the kitchen window when I'm at the sink, which happens so many times daily, I couldn't even wager a guess.
She has company now.

All along, our canine PDX friend, Jack, waited for the right place and time to spend eternity with us in The Shire since he visited often and enjoyed running around and playing in the creek.
Because they knew each other, I felt it sage they should keep one another company, and when it was time to place Zabby's body into that bough-lined grave, we added his cremains as well.
So I should say, they have company now.

Back in August, I wrote of Moose's death and that he'd be placed under the plum tree with his littermate, Minnie-Pie.
Her demise was swift and hard, which I've also written about.
And since I was so devastated by it, maintained an ornate memorial on a specially constructed shelf above our bedroom door, because I wasn't ready to say goodbye to her forever quite yet.
But again, now that they had each other, it was time for a proper burial.
They too, went into a lovely hollow draped in ferns and flowers, each with a printed version of their stories, favorite toys, pictures and date of death with a brief, handwritten tribute.
The soil was rocky, perhaps left overs of the house we believed to have existed there before a fire years earlier.
So with stones, created a cairn, which was mostly just a mound of large pebbles, with the intent to mark them with a beautiful fruit tree later.

In fact, that was always the idea.
That the area around the plum tree would become an orchard; we'd add more and more to it as funds allowed.
CAM hated all the grass in our yard and vowed to systematically replace it with gardens, both ornamental and edible.
Granted, in theory a grand vision. Actualizing it, not so easy.
But still, the plan remained and then morphed into a 'green' cemetery of sorts.

Enter the 3 1/2 year old.
Jack's human sister, V, is a child with the gift of acuity.
No doubt her parents have something to do with her precocious development, but much of it comes intuitively.
While her mother explained how sad I was when Minnie died and the emotions overtaking me, she paused, contemplating, then offered up her 'heart-thoughts' to me.
There was no better word for it.
I've shamelessly co-opted the term as I send along condolences of my own now.
I suppose those with more conventional religious views are okay with saying 'prayers', but having disavowed that long ago, don't like to use it:
Making Heart Thoughts the perfect sentiment.
What greater way to convey the empathy of grief than by sharing the heaviness of heart one endures at the death of a loved one?
It's as if you can feel the major organ itself heaving and speaking the love and loss directly.

Fake $ Store flowers serve as temporary adornments

When our animals started to leave us, their mortal remains returned to the Earth from which they came.
I'd like the same for myself, actually.
The notion that my un-embalmed, natural physical body can nourish another growing thing enthralls me; the circle of life!
As well with them.
I want to mark their final rest with a living memorial, a lasting testament to their time spent here with us.
And so it's begun.
Before the new year, we bid Dodger adieu.
He's taken his place nearby the other cats, but far enough away from the dogs as he was no fan.
A solitary fellow, he gets his own enhanced spot, and his own fruit tree- a Black Tartarian cherry, which I chose tongue in cheek since he could be such a sourpuss at times.
The tuxedo brother and sister, very cleverly, as they reign from Seattle, rest in peace under the Puget Sound apricot sapling.
Eventually, others will join them and they will be honored in the same way.

Out my kitchen window.
In HeartThoughts Meadow.

Chickens Lucy-Lu & Brigid are buried in the SE corner of the yard and now have gladiolas and daffs marking their grave

And a happy 100th! birthday today to my paternal grandfather, 'Bob'. You would never meet a more generous and kinder soul. I miss you, good man.